Before we got married, my now-husband and I met with our minister for a prenuptial “interview.” The conversation was uneventful, but our minister asked one question that has always resonated with me: “How would you handle things if, one day, you have a child who struggles more with academics than you have?”
The question seemed to come out of left field. But then he pointed out that both my husband and I had done well in school, were close to finishing advanced degrees, and seemed to take scholarship and success quite seriously. Would we place high expectations on our child or children? At the time, we both thought it was an unusual question and chuckled a bit at the idea — kids were not quite on our timeline yet. We answered, of course, that we would let our future children be who they were in life and not push them to be “overachievers,” as we were sometimes called.
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